Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Snow Joke: The New Minnesota Twins and the End of an Absurdly Long Winter



After splitting a double-header with the Miami Marlins and their new manager “Red Dog” Redmond yesterday, your Minnesota Twins sit at 9-8 as the 2013 season nears the end of its first month. And the temperature finally hit 50 degrees in the Twin Cities today, only a month and three days after the start of spring and two days after the 4th or 5th measurable snow storm of April. Crews at Target Field had to hustle in order to clear Tuesday night’s snow from the field and stands to prepare the stadium for yesterday’s two-game docket. For those scoring at home, we have two professional sports teams in this state winning more than half their games AT THE SAME TIME!!! right now, the first time we can claim that since the fall of 1979.* Like the 2012 Vikings, this year’s Twins were almost unanimously picked to finish at or near the bottom of the AL Central this year, but they find themselves in an unexpectedly high spot in the division right now. They would be one game out of a playoff spot if the season ended today.**
*Not a correct statistic.
 **...That one checks out.

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Closing (Tubby) Time: One Last Call for Basketball





Less than 24 hours after the Golden Gophers basketball team’s season-ending defeat in a 78-64 against a strong Florida Gators squad, Minnesota athletic director Norwood Teague flicked the lights off for the Tubby Smith Era of Gophers hoops.  The local media has approved the move for the most part, while the national folks have lamented the pink slip received by one of the good guys in college basketball and decried Teague’s and the program’s aspirations to become something more than a second-and-a-half-ish tier team in a big-time conference. Come on, they say. Count your blessings. You’re Minnesota. You’re located in the nation’s hinterlands, and you’re about as big a basketball powerhouse as McDonald’s is a place to get great ribs. You just fired the best thing you had going for you.